Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Begin As You Mean To Go On

 Some of the best parenting advice I think I have ever received came from a blog whose name is lost to me now. It has stayed with me though, and I have even passed it on to others. It was, "Begin as you mean to go on."

I was happily surprised this week when reading  Chapter 4 of Volume 6  of the Original Homeschooling Series to discover that perhaps the blogger's original source was Charlotte Mason:

                "It is necessary that we should all follow an ordered course, and children, even infant children, must begin in the way in which they will have to go on." Vol. 6, p.70.
 
Principles for habit training, authority and docility, [training] the way of the will, and methods of education can all be derived from this deceptively simple statement.

Sometimes I allow things to begin that as an individual, wife, mother, or home educator I had no intention of ever allowing, much less allowing to go on. Once they have been permitted, however, they incrementally and insidiously take over more and more territory until a bad habit is established that must be overcome... which is ever so much more difficult than not allowing the habit to develop in the first place, though it may not seem so at the moment of its inception. The cultivation of good habits requires watchfulness and diligence, and is hard work itself, particularly when it runs counter to the status quo.

I think the takeaway is that when we are at a 'beginning' we need to have a vision for the end. Not the complete picture, but at least an overarching goal or hope for what lies ahead.  I am guilty too often of not taking a few moments to evaluate whether what I am doing or planning supports what I believe to be good and true. A knee-jerk, "Oh, that sounds like a good activity/curriculum/idea," or a weary, "Okay," often is not such a good idea at all.




10 comments:

  1. This applies to my classroom, as well... Every time I think, "okay, just this once," I create an even larger problem.

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    1. I agree. "Just this once..." is so dangerous! There are a lot of "Just this once's" around here that somehow became part of the routine.

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  2. Very good advice. We have trouble during snack time. I allow one snack. Eventually one kid will ask, "Can I have a healthy snack since I just had a sweet snack?" And I'll give in not wanting to deal with it at the moment. Soon every child is eating willy-nilly and I have to reign it back in.

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  3. I *love* this post...and I think I needed to hear it today as I ponder some of the things that went wrong in our day. I think there are a number of things around here that I've allowed to begin and now I'm reaping that. :(

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    1. Hi Brandy,
      It's nice to know I am not alone in this, though I am sorry you had a rough day. Charlotte Mason was so right when she said that good habits are the key to smooth and easy days... I think the best place to start is probably by examining my own habits and what they are modeling to my children:)

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  4. I don't have so much trouble beginning the way that I want to go, but staying there - now that's so much harder. I seem to run out of time, or forget the new routine, or am distracted. Consistency is not my strength :(

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    1. Hi Catherine,
      I, too, often begin things that I think are worthy and have trouble staying the course, for a variety of reasons... And then there are the things I start that seem so wonderful, and as we go on I realize they might not have been the best idea after all. Consistency and thinking things through are things I am hoping to improve.

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  5. 'I am guilty too often of not taking a few moments to evaluate...' Ouch. Must admit I'm rather impulsive - I try to push my mental pause button before I commit to things but old habits die hard.

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  6. Thank you for this gentle reminder of the slippery slope, Jessica!

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  7. Great thought to ponder, particularly as I look at training my brood of all young ones...thank you for sharing this!

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